The Perfect Woman

After another failed relationship (The same relationship as the last 5 failures).. I’ve decided to put down in writing exactly what I want in a woman. Surely there’s gotta be someone that ticks all these boxes?

  • Likes Animals (more than people)
  • Doesn’t have any kids
  • Doesn’t swear (a lot)
  • Isn’t racist
  • Has a good fringe
  • Overly positive, bordering on naive
  • Either
    • Smarter than me
    • Artistic and therefore on another level
    • Stupid – but well meaning (dizzy?)
  • Has her own career
  • Has dyed her hair pink in the past
  • Wears hats
  • Likes pizza
  • Good teeth
  • Has a driving license
  • Doesn’t wear jeans all the time
  • Knows what xbox live is
  • Likes a drink, but doesn’t need to drink to enjoy herself
  • Doesn’t smoke
  • Doesn’t have an orange fake-tan face
  • Is about 5 foot 6
  • Weighs about 1011 stone

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