Stalkers and Abuse – Part 3

Saturday, November 14, 2015

You can read part 2 here.

2011 and 2012 came and went without any contact from Andrew. Then in 2013 I got a single long email. It's November, getting towards the holiday season again, which are usually when his blow ups occur. My gran had died recently, so I used that as a test, to remind him that historically this didn't end well.

My gran died recently. You'll probably need that information to properly harass my family this time.

To which he replied.

date: Wed, Nov 13, 2013 at 1:02 AM
subject: RE: Unsolicitations!

I am sorry to hear this Garry :((
This must be a difficult time.

I also, for what it's worth, reiterate my apology for the debacle in 2008/2009. There was no excuse for my ugly behaviour. It was a collection of very serious mistakes emmanting from a very immature mind and I was too proud and arrogant to see that for a long time. I concluded, incorrectly, "Garry and pipodebeuker are bullying me about something very sensitive", it's the school playground all over again, and then, without pausing to allow you to deny involvement, or the alcohol and energy drinks to wear off, or to get some sleep, or realize the disgustingness of what I was actually saying, chose to act in an outrageous manner that warranted the steps you took. It wasn't fun coming under all the abuse, but it was self-inflicted. You told me at the time that I would "regret it". And for a number of years I have regretted, not your retaliation, but how far into the sewer I lowered myself.

No-one in your family will be harassed or contacted by me under any circumstances, of that you can be assured.

I was a VERY angry, bitter person at that time. I am now EXTREMELY cautious about how I deal with others.

Again, I am sorry for your loss and won't send you anymore unsoliticed comments. I also apologize for any upset my monologue may have caused :(

Take care.

I hadn't heard from him for a long time, so maybe he hard spent the last two years growing and done some real thinking, got some real help. He'd apologised before and then done the exact same thing shortly afterwards, but this seemed different. It wasn't wrapping a threat, he wasn't suggesting that any of it was my own fault, he took the blame completely. So good on him, maybe he is fixed.

Maybe not.

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 5:36 AM
subject: KUYDNA / crap, power-abusing mods.

Am I correct in assuming back in 2008 when you said I was banned for life that you meant LIFE and this still applies?

Well, I hate to break it to you but I have been back with the name Kuydna for several months and posted 100+ times. Read that name backwards. Not exactly NSA-worthy cipher is it? Your genius mods missed that. Also they've been deleting important threads in the RC, some of which was intended for you (including ideas on how to make the forums pay for themselves), standard practise? Oh and they abuse their power pretty relentlessly, banning people who offend their friends etc.

You may need some new mods.

Happy New Year.

He'd joined our forums again and got banned, and was now arguing with one of our moderators. He'd emailed me to tip me off about the moderators deleting his threads in the refugee camp (a special forum for banned people to appeal their bans).

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 6:10 AM
subject: Cc of RC message to craptasket

Sending to you before he gets opportunity to delete it from RC

"Craptasket why are you trying to sterilize that thread of all debate? I essentially won the argument, on my fucking own, as the other people espousing the same opinions as me seem to have got bored and wandered off. Most people were pretty reasonable about this debate, putting up their arguments, backing them up etc, apart from 2 key people (Helix Snake and Hexpunk) who decided they couldn't have my side win, so decided to become abusive. I tried to report the abuse, was ignored, so retaliated in kind, then I got 7 day ban from megafan lol. What's the point of that? Debate means both sides get equal share of the floor, and if one side starts winning it's accepted graciously. Why have debate if only 1 side is permitted an opinion? If you're that biased you shouldn't be a mod. In all honesty can you see me attack anyone in that thread without having being attacked first? If mods had done their jobs properly and responded to my flame reports I wouldn't have taken things into my own hands like that."

.......Hopefully you see past the fact this information is coming from me and see it as potentially symptomatic of something that's gone wrong on the forums.

I replied to this, telling him he was permabanned from the forums for a reason, and asked him not to rejoin, not to email again.

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 7:59 AM
subject: Re: Cc of RC message to craptasket

You are a fool, and an arrogant, complacent one at that, no wonder you're getting DDoS'd left, right and centre, you actively MAKE people dislike you. I try to help and you throw it back in my face, even suggesting in the RC ways to make the forums pay for themselves, I even defended you on your shifty basement-dweller-infested forum against people saying your success was all due to luck, well, fuck you, I'll make as many Alts as I want. Try and stop me. Maybe I'll participate in the DDoS'ing too.
PS rust looks like shite, flukey cunt. Oh and yeah, YOU should pay 75% tax, the thread dickheads were right on that count. Horrible abrasive tit.

This is a recurring theme of Andrews. He has a lot of trouble with rejection, with the word no. Again I don't think that this can be blamed on aspergers. I'm sure even people with asperger's realise that acting out like this pretty much guarantees that they'll never get what they want, not only just this time. This is upbringing, or lack of.

I replied "Yep. That's the Andy we remember. Please cease contact with me. Please leave our forms and blogs alone.".

Garry you act like a cockend then wonder why people respond badly....

My Dad has the exact same bad fucking habit and now he's preparing for a lonely old age essentially ostracized from his whole family. If you had nothing positive / non-confrontational to say why bother replying in the first place? Politeness costs nothing. I was only trying to be helpful FFS, no need for, "no one cares what you say".

This is the first time he mentioned his dad iirc. Andrew blames everyone else for his situation. His mom, his step dad, the english, the french, feminists, jews, scousers, brummies, but most of all his dad. This is his most fundamental problem, it's why the first email I received from him where he accepted blame was so significant, why I thought he might have turned the corner.

I replied:

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 8:38 AM
subject: Re: Cc of RC message to craptasket

I thought you were finished with this stupid crap, making a fool of yourself on the internet, making me hate you even more. What do you think is the best thing that can come from it? It seems like better things could be achieved by turning off your computer and stopping caring. This is a lose lose for all of us.

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 8:51 AM
subject: Re: Cc of RC message to craptasket

Only reason I contacted you was to report the dumb destructive behaviour of your mods, otherwise I would have continued keeping clear. But apparently you're still so butthurt from 2008 that you refuse to accept anything from me regardless of value, fine, so be it. I can forget grudges in an instant, some people need to hold onto them forever.

So I thought I'd clue him into why I was butthurt. I appreciate that from his point of view my Grandad wasn't a person. He was a name, a photo. He maybe couldn't comprehend what he did.

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 9:03 AM
subject: Re: Cc of RC message to craptasket

I am sure you would hold a grudge too if I made a Facebook profile of
your dead grandad, poked your sisters with it, made jokes about child
abuse with it, and you had to watch your mom and sisters cry because
of it.

My grandad lived for 78 years. I knew him all of my life. He was a
bricklayer, he worked all over the world. He had 5 kids. He took me
boxing when I was 9. He bought me a teenage mutant turtles costume
when I was 7. And when I think of his funeral I just remember the
abusive Facebook profile, taunting his death.

That's why I hold a grudge.

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 9:20 AM
subject: RE: Cc of RC message to craptasket

Yes I fucked up, I know, but do you know why I did? No, and you don't care either. You only see your side of things....did you ever stop just once to ask, "why did he do this, what could motivate someone to go so low"?

Also why wasn't your Mum shielded from this? She should never have been shown that. Did it also never occur to you once that perhaps I was inundating you with ideas, tips, suggestions etc was as a way to try undoing the damage? It was impossible to go back in time and stop the fiasco from happening, but maybe there was a way to try and compensate somehow.... :(

I do really think that he regrets what he did. I think he regrets it enough to have stopped contacting me for two years. But I don't believe he regrets it enough to stop him doing the exact thing again, or worse.

If it's any other additional consolation you have those fond memories of him....and I have nothing. No fond memories, not of family, or anything else. Just pain, darkness and overwhelming desire for revenge. You'd be doing me a favour if you had me whacked, tell me to go to a specific place, anywhere in the UK, where you can have someone carry out the hit, I don't care anymore and you'd be saving a fucking lot of lives down the road. You won Garry, a long time ago.

Don't tell anyone I offered this, once you do, you'll lose the option / become prime suspect.

You asked what is there to gain, what is the best thing to come of this. You get to say to your Mum and Sisters, "remember that guy, well, he got what was coming to him. It was uunpleasant". What else do you get, knowing I won't be able to do the things I'm going to do. Only a bullet in my head can stop me and suicide is not an option, not unless I could take a few billion random mooks with me. What do I get, that's not for you to worry about. Isn't that what you want, revenge? You'd feel better wouldn't you, and if you got a pro you'd get away with it. Let's sort it out, you could get some in Birmingham to do it for 10k I'd bet.

Yeah. He offered to let me have him killed. Jesus.

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 10:55 AM
subject: Re: Cc of RC message to craptasket

Or I guess I could walk away and never contact you again - you'd never get your revenge, you'd never say to your sister's and Mum, "that monster is fucking dead", also lying about me begging for mercy etc to make them feel even better, and you'd always be wondering, "what did he mean, what things is he going to do? How? When?". Don't worry NOTHING against you or yours, just in general. You have the means to stop it, to be a hero. The police, psychs? Lol. Once 3 burly police were stood in my living room telling me, "you can't say things like this by email, you might scare someone", I nodded politely and they fucked off. They just increased my determination. No-one speaks down to me, nor police or fucking God himself. If the Universe didn't want me to one day commit an atrocity, a bloodbath, or many, then maybe it wouldn't have fucking tortured me non-stop for almost 4 ducking decades. And my comments are non-specific to avoid arrest or rubber rooms lol. I won't change my mind. Only death will stop me. You are one of the few people who I think knows what I'm capable of. Admit it, you want me dead, let me help. ADMIT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Also don't worry no-one on my side would try to retaliate, they let my kid sister be murdered so they'll stand by and let it happen to me to.


date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 11:15 AM
subject: Re: Cc of RC message to craptasket

If you don't want to mess about with guns, knives or hitmen then you or Craig could always drive into me really fast, we could make it look like an accident. I won't suicide, but I won't make much of an effort to escape execution by your hand or a proxies on your behalf. I could also delete the contents of sent folder the night before and eliminate any other paper trail.

Fuck, you could make a Unity player game that involves torturing or killing me - do something, how can you be content with, "I have a grudge, cya"? What do you want?


You're right, I would hold a grudge and the guilty party may face.....inconveniences......

I did not realize it'd had such a profound effect.....

Do you mind if I make an alt but something worded in your honour?

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 10:02 PM
subject: Few questions

1) Why did you post about your grandad on your blog when he died? At the time you even said, "someone will probably use this against me". If I hadn't been the one I think you know damn well someone else would have. Doesn't this make it partly your fault? Why share every private detail with the public anyway, people are cunts.

2) Why didn't you go to the police? Hezzy (lol that got autocorrected to Jesus) thought you had a pretty strong case. Why don't you go now?

3) Why did I make the profile? I thought you and Pipodebeuker were in somekind of union against me. He was writing seriously insulting shit about me on your blog. Why did I poke your sister's? I asked them to try and talk to you on my behalf about the Pipo thing, they just laughed and told me to go fuck myself as did your ex.

Sorry but if someone starts a fight with me, I'll finish it, and that's what it looked like was happening. Also I almost never start fights. Maybe you were one of the bullies on the school playground, right? BQut I was one if the victims, and it wasn't bullying, it was fucking torture. I'm still affected more than 25 years on, it's fucking affected every facet of my life and personality. And if I ever spaz one day and go on a killing spree or something, that'll be at the fucking core of it.

4) How fucking stupid and selfish was it to show your Mum, a completely INNOCENT party? Don't blame me for that. I had no beef with her whatsoever.

5) Sorry your sister's cried but they should have had a less dismissive attitude about Pipodebeuker and you apparently conspiring against me. I politely requested their help and they barfed it back up in my face.

6) Why think of the profile instead of the funeral, are you not in control of your own mind? Forget the stupid fucking profile, it was almost 6 years ago, think about the good things about your grandad, the way he would have wanted to be remembered.

Do I hold a grudge? I did for a few months, in 2008/9 then forgot about it and chose to see positive stuff about you, your works and FPS.
However, I still don't understand why you sided with pipodebeuker letting him post deeply offensive shit while blocking me. For me it was the school playground again, not trying to start anything, just curious. I guess I must have really pissed you off by mocking your choice of phones :/

The fucking iphone again.

date: Thu, Jan 2, 2014 at 10:18 PM
subject: Last email

I wrote that last, big email with the questions just now not because I want anything from you, but to underscore your part in all this as well as the futility of holding grudges. They eat you up inside, gnawing away at your soul until there's nothing left. Making you age before your time. Trust me, I know, but the damage is done for me, it's too late, don't make my mistake. Don't let your kids even get a whiff of that kind of toxic negativity. Take care man,

Sorry about sneaking back onto forums like that, I was lurking and saw a thread I couldn't resist barging into.
But evidently me and forums do not go together. It always goes badly wrong. So, sorry, I'll leave your forums and blogs alone

After all of this.. mentions of suicides and mass killings, I felt like I had to do something. It annoys me in a way. I'm a game developer. I made a computer game. And now I'm a fucking baby sitter and social worker. But I had to do something, if something happened and I could have prevented it, I needed to let someone know. So I put on my detective hat and found his mom on Facebook. I sent her a message.

She replied positively, thanked me for notifying her, asked me to hold off reporting him to the police. So I felt like I'd done by duty, I'd handed off responsibility and I could sleep well in that knowledge.

date: Sun, Jan 5, 2014 at 8:55 AM
subject: Paying to reduce ban-times

Did you see my post about that on the RC that the mods deleted?

I think it could earn money to help pay the hosting bills for the forums....

You have a right to see it, even if you dismiss it as crap. Want me to resend?

He sent about 20 emails around this time. Nothing abusive. Advice, questions. I didn't reply to any of them.

date: Sun, Jan 26, 2014 at 3:25 PM
subject: Gayry Gayman

Isn't this where you normally start posting lots of abusive one-sided shit about me on all your crappy sites so your gay little 12 year old fanboys can attack me, without me having a chance to have my say due to being blocked?

That's what happened with the iPhone shit. And that's why I felt perfectly justified in the granddad saga, if you wanna go for round 2, let's do it, but this time I know where you fucking work, and you're so thick you don't keep things like addresses secret, just bear that in mind. I bet you never once bothered to ask yourself what you'd done to cause that, no, you're too fucking arrogant for that!

Like I said in 2008, you're a one-hit-wonder. Rust hasn't surpassed GMod, and it this rate it's going to be remembered as a failure riddled with hackers and bugs. I knew you'd fuck it up. Considering how arrogant and stupid you are, even by english standards (hell, even by west midlands standards), never listening to advice, no matter how good it is.

Also, there's a record of you stating you "hating" me, from one of your previous emails, which has already been forwarded, so if anything happens to me, you'll be suspect #1

All I can learn from you now is how not to do things, and quite frankly they're such rookie errors I wouldn't make them in the first place.

Dumb english cunt. No wonder everyone hates you lot. I'd laugh so hard if you scum suffered a 9-11 type situation, ideally thousands of times worse, maybe a bioattack or something.

date: Sun, Jan 26, 2014 at 7:16 PM
subject: Stop now

So now there is a record of you speaking to my Mum - that info could only come from private detectives or something, right? There is no way you could have found her surname and a link to me using online means only. Clearly someone, somewhere has been paid and most likely laws broken too.

And there is also a record of you recently stating you "HATE" me and articulating how enraged you still are by 2008. Scary....

So if anything happens to me or my relatives....

All this means you might also know their address, or even my address. This is quite threatening g-man. In 2008 that shit with your family was entirely offline, no laws were broken in finding that info, they were all in your friends list. So, you've either paid someone to do something illegal or done it yourself to get that private data. How should I process these facts? Knowing you and your total disregard for other people's privacy and your God-complex, or whatever the fuck it is that you got from the forums, you'll probably do something stupid. I expect an answer to this otherwise I'm gonna think the very worst.

I don't want this to escalate but it will if you don't act humbly and rationally for once in your whole life.

PS I just wrote a similar message to the unsolicited message my Mum got from you, to [My Mom's Name] but Firefox crashed before I had the chance to send it, count yourself lucky, I won't rewrite it, for now....

PPS any ideas for a "hilarious" Unity3D game about older people from Walsall.....?? I'd prefer to develop something else though.

PPPS if this email is too complicated for you, too many syllables etc, then run it by your lawyer or someone else with a fucking clue. This needs to stop now and you have made it so much worse by dragging my family into it.

It seems that his mom finally got around to talking to him. Instead of calming him down it had the opposite reaction. It has created paranoia. Maybe it was a bad move.

date: Mon, Jan 27, 2014 at 12:03 AM
subject: "Dark thoughts"

If you thought that was aimed at you btw, it wasn't. None of it. Maybe that's why you thought it was acceptable to bother my Mother? But, why would I want to get the cheap slosh that passes for english working-class blood on my precious skin or clothes, or die in the process? No, it was more of a generalized statement. I'm not interested in you or your family. Why destroy my own life for a handful of wez midlundaz!? Oh wait, that was more of a newcastle accent wasn't it. Meh, who cares, they all sound retarded.
But good luck telling the police I'm planning to one day do to the english what Hitler did to the Jews, even if it takes DECADES of hard work, you'll be laughed out of the station. No-one will take it seriously. Until it's too late. Hell, they're not even particularly unusual thoughts, everyone dislikes you lot, I'll be doing the world a favour. But more likely than not some foreign power; the EU, the Russians, or some terrorist group will have long done it before I get the chance. I am actually more worried about what YOU might do to me, we all know how irrational and unpredictable you limeys are, mind you, you're also a bunch of pussified cowards, all mouth. If you tell the police I have threatened you or your family you will be lying, where's the proof? Not once have I threatened you with violence. No, the goal is your whole worthless fucking nationality, all 50,000,000+ of you. I'll have plenty of allies along the way to help and what's even more wonderful it sounds so ridiculous that no-one will even try to stop me LMAO! :D

Tell my Mum, she already knows, but luckily for me, and all the enemies of the subhuman limey infestation, she doesn't take it remotely seriously. I win.

You owe me and my Mother apologies.

Your beer is disgusting. Good thing I have some nice foreign beer here.

The only good thing about your floating turd in the North Sea, sorry, Island, is the foreign things.

I'd totally forgotten about all that shit, and then you go and stupidly reopen all the old wounds. Ok, now it's my turn to be the bully.

Have you seen, little homo child-molesting cunt, how many vids I've posted on now??? And the fun is just beginning.

Why should I EVER stop lashing out at you after 2008 and now 2014?

At this point he started posting angry ranting comments on every popular GMod and Rust video he could find on Youtube.

date: Mon, Jan 27, 2014 at 1:08 AM
subject: sarah

is an obese minger, even by english standards, yet that's the best you can do even though you already had £1m+ when you met. You essentially bought her.

Fucking loser. I hate you so much.

He forwarded an email he'd sent to him mom.

date: Mon, Jan 27, 2014 at 1:28 AM
subject: Fwd: The gloves are off now, Holy war commences!

Sent on Facebook.....he contacts you, and you defend him against me,
then I contact her and insult him and his sister as much as possible.
Only fair. No doubt you'll both defend them again. Other people are
always right, Andrew is always wrong. You've ruined my ability to trust
other Human beings btw, my Dad too. Too late to help me now. My life
will end badly, either in my bloodshed and/or the bloodshed of many many
many MANY other people, you are all to blame. All I needed was love,
support, understanding, compassion, some good luck, but I didn't get
one, NOT ONE FUCKING IOTA of that in almost 38 years, not even during my
formative years. Well done.

"Hello Mrs Newman,

Do you know what I am? 2008. Familiar now?

I didn't want you to see any of those comments, they were for your
disgusting shit of a son and his disgusting shit of an elder sister, and I am sorry you were exposed to those comments.

They were not for your eyes or ears. It just shows how selfish your children are I suppose. They should have known better than to allow you to see those comments.

Well, garry is determined to provoke me again, just as he did in 2008. He is sending insulting messages to my Mother who he tracked down with private detectives, and by bribing a former forum moderator who is a corrupt policeman. He is attacking me on his website and planning to attack me on his blog and most likely on his twitter too.

Well................I will not be bullied by him again, as I was in 2008, which forced my retaliation which unfortunately you were exposed to. This time I will retaliate much much MUCH worse than in 2008 so I strongly suggest you tell your son to walk off a cliff, or failing that, to apologize to my Mother for contacting her to shit-talk me and apologize to me and forget about any plans he has to cause me further problems. If he insists on continuing to bully me he will be opening the gates of Hell and he will
never recover, I will retailiate to any further attacks and will never stop. It will cause mayhem for your family. Let's not go down this wreckless path.

I hope that you can see the logic in what I'm saying and tell your wayward imbecile cretin of a son to behave himself. I have tried being tolerant and patient but he refuses to listen to reason, maybe you can talk sense into him before all Hell breaks loose. I am sorry again that you were exposed to my negative comments in 2008, garry is very good at provoking the worst in people.


As far as I know, he never actually sent this message.

date: Mon, Jan 27, 2014 at 2:10 AM
subject: Why do so many people hate you?

Why? They're all in the wrong, or maybe YOU are doing something wrong? Just a thought

date: Mon, Jan 27, 2014 at 2:15 AM

They all hate you newman, and want nothing to do with you, the only one who is willing to listen is me. If you contact anyone who is remotely related to me again they will tell me and I will contact the police. Alternatively I will contact your familly online in the worst ways possible. You have been warned.

If you have anything to say, you can say it to me. I do not live with my parents and they do not run my life, say it to me. I am also about 1000% smarter than they ever will be. They do not "calm me" down, as you asserted, you have kicked a hornet's nest by contacting my Mother in that unsolicited way.

Take this is an official warning.

You should be happy that I haven't been able to play GMod, which I paid for twice, since 2008 thanks to you installing a Trojan that targets me specifically, no doubt there is one in Rust too. How much more do you need to victimize me? I spend good money on GMod but can't play it because it'll detect me through my IP then proceed to wipe my hard disk, or whatever the Hell sneaky thing you did back then, bet you never removed it either. It's a total piece of piss to implement so why should I believe otherwise?

Do you have any ideas how rude it is to ignore people? Ok, not now as it's 3AM, but before when it was a civilized hour. This is probably another reason people hate you. You want me to calm down, then answer my questions and allay my fears. Then I'll fuck off forever, ok?

Sleep is for the week. We have stuff to discuss.

All this shit's given me a headache, you're probably happy now.

date: Mon, Jan 27, 2014 at 3:37 AM
subject: Future advice

Don't worry, there won't be anymore, you made me hate you again. Guess it's mutual now.

PS when I'm richer that you you'll never hear the end of it. I will hire people to drive around your neighbourhood yelling into a bullhorn, reminding you of my financial supremacy. This is the main reason, of many, I am not a physical threat to you, so I can eventually gloat.

I should be working on my game, but you're distracting me with all this shit.

You are Steve Jobs and I am Bill Gates. Bill Gates crushed Steve Jobs.

Why are you English such two-faced, backstabbing, immoral, irrational, unreliable, dishonest cunts? Is it something genetic, or maybe cultural, or both? I don't get it. Also what is this lie about, "fair play"? You don't do that, you not only kick people when they're down, you cover them with petrol then throw the match. How is it you never get punished for anything or have to pay any price? As a nationality you always land on your two feet, any other group would long have starved to death or been conquered even after making only a fraction of your mistakes. Maybe it's what happens when your ruling elites are all devil-worshipping, funny-handshake, Illuminati types?

Why are you limeys such insufferable snobs?

Anyway, you deserved 7-7, and hopefully the next one is nuclear and in multiple cities.

Notice I haven't attacked any of your relatives? You're welcome.

How do you feel that your country is on the edge of a civil war?

What's your favorite color? :)

So I woke up to all these emails and a bunch more. I came to a realisation. I'm making this hard for both of us. This is going to keep repeating and repeating. How I'm handling it isn't going to stop it. Andrew isn't going to change on his own.

Maybe he needs a friend. Maybe he needs someone to tell him when he's fucking up. Someone he respects. Andrew is nearly 40, that means his parents have got to be in their 60s or 70s. What a fucking burden for them, to have to deal with him like he's 12 years old. The more I thought about it, the more I felt sorry for them. Maybe I can make their lives easier, better. Maybe I can make Andrew's life better, easier. Maybe I can make the situation better by being Andrew's friend.

Find out how that worked out in Part 4.
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